Fifty-nine

Sometimes, you just have to write what you feel.

September 14, 2019

Fifty-nine
Today you would have been
fifty-nine

I might have teased you

Practically six decades
I would have said

I can’t remember
if I called to wish you well
the day of your birth
in that final and forty-eighth year

I hope I did

A sister’s grief
is clear
as a threatening sky
A heavy blanket of gray
with a hole here and there
for the tears to fall through

We were never close
you and I

But
what if

I’d tried harder
to be the sister you needed

Could we ever have been friends
You my protector and wise counsel
Me a good listener with a sunny disposition

We were never close and
all that’s left
is a cloud of regret

heavy with
what should have been

Questions about what
could have been

about why you left us
without an occasion to ever again
wish you
a happy birthday

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